Double Vision
by Destination-Zero
Summary: Reno unknowingly crosses the line and upsets a certain derranged Shinra scientist. And now that scientist is gonna teach him a lesson while testing out some of his research. If it looks like a Turk is it really a Turk?
1. Don't mess with people in lab coats

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters or the settings.

**A/N: **Yeah, I know you're thinking "Wat? Halloween? It's almost Christmas!!" This was another old story that was posted last year, and now it's being re-posted and re-edited! Oh joy for me....but I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

"Disgusting." Hojo thought as he looked upon a scene he almost always saw during his daily walk to his lab. That scruffy little Turk was engaged in his usual routine of flirting with one of the many secretaries in the building.

Oh how he hated him.

Any other person would interpret it as him being jealous of the seductive Turk. But he knew himself much better than that. He was jealous of no one.

Sure all the women considered him handsome and often flew into a flurry of whispers and giggles every time he walked past them, but he didn't have what Hojo did.

Brains.

He couldn't understand why that lazy bastard was a Turk anyways. "Because it doesn't take brains to blow someone's head off." He mumbled as he scurried past said Turk and the heavily blushing secretary.

Jealous. Hah. Nothing of the sort.

Angry. More like it.

He could tolerate it from a distance. But then that red headed weasel had to saunter into his territory and try his luck at one of his female lab assistants.

That meant war.

What a perfect opportunity to test his methods on gene splicing. Hah, how ignorant of him to think he could pick a fight with a scientist, a _scientist_ and get away unscathed.

For weeks now he had been tinkering away at his latest machine. Oh was that Turk going to learn a lesson. Yes, this would be quite fun indeed.


	2. Tis the season

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters, or the Monster Mash song, although I do own a little dance I do to it while I'm drunk….never mind.

* * *

_They did the mash! They did the monster mash. The monster mash! It was a graveyard smash…_

The radio blasted in the tiny break room as Reno lounged on the couch chomping away at a candy bar.

"That's kinda loud you know." Rude shouted as he walked in and proceeded towards a table with various coffee machines and stale donuts.

_The monster mash! It caught on in a flash. The monster mash!_

The broad shouldered man turned from the table and gave Reno a death glare. Well, as much as he could with his shades in the way. "What?" Reno asked with his mouth full of chocolate goodness, "You want some?" He asked innocently and held out the slowly disappearing bar towards him.

"No, I want you to turn that noise off." Rude scowled.

"Why? I'm getting into the holiday spirit." He replied as he shoved the rest of the bar in his mouth. "Hey, Tseng never said anything against dressing up did he?" He turned to switch off the radio.

"Dressing up? You mean costume?" Rude said stirring his coffee.

"Hell yeah! I'm coming dressed up. It's Halloween man! The best holiday there is! Chicks dress up in skimpy outfits and…" Rude's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "…what? Don't tell me you've never seen those costumes." Reno asked as his lanky form rose from the couch.

"Skimpy?" Rude repeated.

"Yeah, like a French Maid or a sexy vampire, stuff like that." He said stretching.

"….."

"Don't try and play it off Rude, I know what you're thinking!" He pointed a finger at him accusingly. Rude just looked at him with a blank face.

"You're thinking how nice it'd be to catch Tifa in one of those getups, right?" He wagged his left eyebrow suggestively.

"Fuck off." Rude mumbled and walked back out the door leaving Reno in a fit of laughter.

* * *

It was a slow week for the Turks. And that meant they'd be doing only one thing.

Paperwork.

The dreaded routine of sitting in a desk for hours on end and scribbling away detailed reports of whatever it was you did on an assigned mission. To Reno it was hell. Beyond hell really. How many ways can you write down how you shocked the hell outta somebody just because they tried to attack Rufus?

"Bullshit." He sighed causing some papers on his desk to flutter into disarray. He'd only been at his desk for an hour and already he felt like taking a much needed coffee break. No, not coffee break. Who actually drinks coffee on their breaks anyways? He needed a break to mess with someone. Particularly the petite blond sitting at the desk next to him.

She was engrossed in her paperwork, eyebrows knitted in concentration, scribbling away like her life depended on it. A cruel smirk crawled it's way onto his lips as he slammed his fist down on her desk causing her to jump a few good inches in her chair. "Hey El guess what!" He yelled.

"Wha the - WHAT?!" Elena yelled back, her face flushed with adrenalin.

"Guess what I'm gonna be for Halloween." His smile widened.

"I don't care!" She huffed and looked down at her paper. It now had a bold black line across half the page due to the idiot next to her scaring the crap outta her. "Look what you made me do!" She held the paper up to his face. Reno's eyes widened at the sight, then he burst into laughter. "It's not funny Reno!" He laughed harder. "Just for that…" She took the opportunity to reach over to his desk and scribble on some of his papers, that is before he whacked her hand away - hard. "Damn!" She hissed rubbing her red hand.

"Too slow." His laughter now suppressed to giggles. "So, guess." He continued.

"Ok, fine. Let me see a pumpkin? Who cares?" She threw her pen onto the desk.

"Nope. A pumpkin? C'mon El, ya gotta think outside the box." He rolled his comfy leather chair towards her desk.

"Ok, a box." She didn't feel up to his antics this morning.

"Nope. Ok, I'll give you some hints. It's ugly, loud, has violent mood swings, and scares little kids." He waited expectantly, like a child eagerly waiting for his birthday gifts.

"Uh, I don't know. What?" She replied un-enthused.

"YOU!!!" He shouted and rolled back in his chair to his desk, barely avoiding her slap.

"You seriously need to get locked in the basement." She sighed.

Rude walked in with a newspaper in one hand and coffee in another. "Got this," He waved the paper and placed it on Reno's desk, "in case you wanted to read it."

"Why how thoughtful of you." Reno drawled.

"Because I know you won't be doing any real work." Rude added.

"Hey! I get stuff done." Reno defended as he began shifting through the pages.

"At the last minuet." Rude replied as he sat at his desk next to Elena.

"Whatever." Reno mumbled as his search through the paper became more frantic. "AHA! I found it!" He pulled out a catalogue and began examining it. "See Rude I told you. All kinds of skimpy outfits."

That garnered Elena's attention. "Skimpy? What are you talking about?"

Reno rolled over to her desk and set the catalogue down, "Check it out." She skimmed over to where Reno's finger was pointed to. A skimpy looking cheerleader, a short skirted pilot tipping her hat, a Greek goddess wearing a low cut dress bending over far enough to show her cleavage, a sexy referee outfit with tight short shorts showing the girl innocently blowing a whistle….

"Wow." Rude said standing behind her to catch a look.

"You bet." Reno chimed in. "And just think man, for one day girls go prancing around like that, all we gotta do is sit back and watch."

"Not every girl dresses like that for Halloween." Elena added sternly.

"Well yeah, of course you got the fat girls who can't dress like that, but they can always throw a bed sheet over themselves and go as ghosts or something." He elaborated.

Elena tossed him a glare. "That's not what I meant Reno. I meant that just because a girl has a great body doesn't mean she shows it off like that just for Halloween."

"Oh, I see. Trying a little reverse psychology on me eh? Don't want us to think you'd show up for work in a tight little police uniform to make Tseng notice you huh?" He winked.

"Shut up!" She hissed. Her face grew hot at the thought. She could hear Rude chuckling behind her.

"Well then, what would _you_ wear?" Reno asked. He was putting her in a corner. Trying to prove her wrong.

"Well, let's see…." She was up for the challenge. She began flipping through pages, "Aw, how cute!" She fawned while pointing to a toddler in a teddy bear costume.

"Oh please, I know that comes in your size El, but pick something else would ya?" Reno said.

She flipped to the girls section and began browsing. Hardly anything was in good taste, except for the pirate costumes, but who wants to be a pirate?

"I say that one!" Reno shoved his hand in front of her face and pointed to a girl dressed like a sexy nurse.

"Are you kidding me?" The dress looked skin tight and seemed to be made out of some plastic like material. It'd probably stick to her skin with even the slightest bit of perspiration.

"Speaking of hot nurses," Reno turned to look up at Rude, "Have you seen Hojo's new assistant?" He gave a low whistle. "I'd let her examine me any day."

"You mean Elizabeth? Reno leave her alone, she's a nice girl who doesn't need you hounding after her." Elena said tossing the paper back onto Reno's desk.

"That's her name? Nurse Elizabeth….nice." He gave another whistle.

"She's a lab assistant, not a nurse." Rude corrected.

"Yeah, yeah. But it sounds naughty." Reno smirked.

Good grief. Elena often wished there was another girl working with them sometimes. "I'm warning you Reno, leave her alone. Stick to your secretaries instead."

"Okay _mom_. What's wrong with a little friendly conversation? Hm?" He crossed his arms.

"The conversation always leads to other things." Rude added.

"Besides, I don't think Hojo would like his assistant getting distracted on the job." Elena followed.

"Whatever," Reno waved a hand in the air as if shooing the words away from him, "what's that grumpy little geek gonna do about it?"

The pair remained quiet. "Oh please." He got up from his chair and walked to the door. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going on a coffee break." He announced proudly and walked out.

"Yeah right," Elena scoffed, "Who drinks coffee on their break anyways?" She looked at Rude who in turn shrugged.


	3. Specimen Aquired

**Disclaimer**: Don't own anything. Except maybe that cool little machine Hojo has.

* * *

Halloween was only a week away and Reno still didn't have a costume in mind. Plus, he couldn't decide what kind of prank to pull on everyone. But one thing was for sure…

It had to be the best mind fuck ever.

Yeah, it's pretty easy to just jump out and scare people with a hideous looking mask and all, but that's so common. He wanted to do something that would catch them off guard. And he needed the help of a certain nur - assistant, to help him out.

Hopefully she was on lunch break right now. He made his way down the hall passing one of the secretaries he had been flirting with a few days ago. She seemed to be swamped with papers and phone calls.

He peaked through the tiny glass window on the double door entrance to the lab. It didn't look like anyone was in there. He decided to walk in and look around.

The place was blindingly white. There were medical tables on both sides of the room in rows, and towards the back were a huge assortment of machines in the shadows that looked like they came straight out of some sci-fi movies. Maybe he should walk out now…

"Hello?" A sweet, distinctly female voice echoed. A figure in a white lab coat appeared from behind the barrage of sci-fi machines and walked it's way into the light. Dark blond hair in loose curls and bright blue eyes…the naughty nurse herself.

"Oh, Reno. Nice of you to stop by." She smiled shyly. "Do you need something?"

"Well actually…" The door to the lab opened and in came the nutty professor himself, both arms loaded with what looked like medical supplies in clear plastic bags. Well there goes his chance.

"Oh professor, let me help." Elizabeth quickly ran to his side and relieved him of the baggage.

Hojo turned and looked Reno square in the eye. "I'm not very fond of letting Turks into my laboratory." He practically spat. _Someone's_ got a test tube stuck up his ass.

"It's alright professor," Elizabeth came back from setting the supplies in a back room, "He just had a question to ask me." She said sweetly. What a lifesaver! He really didn't wanna put her off by smashing her boss' head in with his EMR.

"Nah, that's ok. I'll stop by some other time." He said casually and threw a wink at her.

"Oh, alright. See you later." She gave a little wave as he headed out the door, but not before giving Hojo as much as a death glare as he could summon. Oh no, Reno does not go down _that_ easy. He'll be back.

* * *

"So?" Rude asked as Reno flicked another pen across the room missing the trash can for the tenth time in a row.

"So what?" He deadpanned.

"Did you talk to that lab assistant?" Rude said leaning back in his chair.

"I tried. But Dr. Demento ruined it." Reno yawned. "I'll try again later. He leaves early anyways right? I'll go then." He glanced at the giant calendar on his desktop. His plan better work.

* * *

"See you guys tomorrow." Elena said grabbing her purse and an overstuffed folder.

"Good luck." Rude whispered to Reno as he headed out the door after Elena.

"Yeah, thanks." Reno mumbled. His day had gotten worse after the Hojo altercation. He was feeling mean and moody, like he needed to beat the pulp out of somebody. Then again, that's what he _would_ be doing if work wasn't so damn slow.

After waiting a few minuets, he strode out into the hallway closing the office door behind him and proceeded to the lab. He took his EMR with him, just in case he stumbled upon someone who he decided would be a worthy candidate for a beating.

He peaked through the lab windows again, searching for that weasel in a lab coat. When he didn't spot him, he entered. The room was a bit dim and there were tables strewn about like someone had been in a frantic search for something. He tightened his grip on his weapon and walked further into the lab.

It looked like no one was around. But why would the door be unlocked? He continued scanning the area when suddenly he caught sight of a bright light out of the corner of his eye. He turned to see a gleaming light coming from where the sci-fi machines were. The light got brighter and bigger until it enveloped his entire face and body in it's glow. He had to turn away to save his eyes the pain.

After a few seconds the light died out and he heard footsteps shuffling around. He searched the room, but all he could see were multi colored dots blinking their way across the room.

Damn that light was bright!

"I thought I made it clear that I don't allow Turks into my laboratory." A voice said. The lights in the lab turned on causing Reno to shield his eyes _again_. This was starting to piss him off in his already pissed off state.

"The door was open." He said sharply. It took a few hard blinks before his vision went back to normal, and he saw Hojo standing next to the machine, his hands folded behind his back. "What was that?" He nodded to the machine. "What did you do to me?" He eyed him carefully.

"What did I do? To _you_?" Hojo sneered then laughed his maniacal scientist laugh. "I did nothing. I was merely testing my machine. _You_ happened to be in the way." He pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

"So what's gonna happen to me?" Reno asked.

"Do you see anything happening to you?" Hojo replied with a grin. This guy had some attitude.

"Just because I don't see anything, doesn't mean it isn't happening douche." Reno mumbled under his breath.

"What was that?" Hojo leaned forward.

"Nothing. Look, is Elizabeth here?" Reno said impatiently. "I need to talk to her."

Hojo frowned then turned to tinker with his machine, "No, she left early."

"Alright. Well, that's what I came here for." He turned and headed for the door.

"Happy Halloween." Hojo called after him.

He stopped, "What?"

"It's every scientists favorite holiday." Hojo said cryptically.

"Whatever." Reno said and walked out the door. So much for being pissed, he felt drained now. And he had a hankering for a drink. Might as well stop by the bar before heading home.


	4. Don't mess with people in lab coats Pt2

**Disclaimer: **Don't own nothing.

**A/N: **Here's a peek inside Hojo's thoughts.

* * *

Perfect.

I didn't think that scrawny little Turk would fall for it. But he did! And now my project begins!

Of course most scientists would think you'd need blood samples or hair samples, but I am no ordinary scientist.

That lovely machine!

All the long nights and hours spent tweaking and honing will finally pay off.

And then…

Then that rodent Turk will be in for the surprise of his life! We'll see just how suave he is while dealing with this.

Yes!

Specimen analysis will begin tonight. First, a thorough scanning of the outer features and then the picking and choosing of traits. And then to choose a suitable body.

The next few days will be hectic indeed, but very well worth it.

I'll show him.

I'll show them _all_ not to cross me.


	5. Sick as a dog

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the characters, or the bar….*sniff*, but I think that's a good thing.

* * *

Seventh Heaven was in it's usual state of business with the inside of it half way decorated for Halloween too, as if that didn't make him feel bad enough. Most of the shops and houses in the area were decorated with the usual spider webs, hanging ghosts and the occasional pumpkin out front.

Reno made his way to the counter and took a seat. To his luck, Tifa was working the bar today, so he'd have someone to mess with, tease and _maybe_ get free drinks from. "Hey, looking kind of down today." Tifa said with a small smile.

"You have no idea." He mumbled. Was it him or did he feel a numb sort of pain emanating from the back of his head?

She'd seen Reno in a foul mood or two before, but something seemed wrong this time. "Tell you what," She perked up, "This one's on me." She reached below the counter and pulled up a bottle of brown liquor. Hopefully it was bourbon, or whiskey, _anything_ but brandy. It always made him sick.

"Well you're too kind babe." He mustered up as much charm as he could as she slid the glass to him. If this was what it took to get free drinks, maybe he should get sick more often. He took a sip and cringed, it tasted terrible. What the hell was going on? Was Tifa pulling a prank on him?

He placed the glass back on the counter and unknowingly slid it forward a bit, like a child would to their plate when they had enough to eat. "Hey Cloud." Tifa acknowledged.

Oh great. Now Strife's gonna get on his case about who knows what. That guy just knows how to piss him off.

He turned to see Cloud taking a seat next to him. "Reno." Cloud said nodding to his presence. Reno just rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to his drink. Damn, his eyes hurt when he did that. And it made the pain somehow travel from the back of his head to the very front. With the events not taking place in his favor, he decided to head home.

"Well Tifa, sorry 'bout not finishing my drink." He said digging into his pocket for some gil. But the money in his pocket was fighting back making it difficult to grasp. He stood up and at once his head started to swirl. Those familiar, evil colored dots from the laboratory came back to laugh at him, and a shrill noise filled his ears. The floor wouldn't stop spinning.

"Reno?!" Tifa shouted. But all he heard was a muffled growl. The last thing he saw was the confused look on Cloud's face before he hit the floor and blacked out.

* * *

"Hello?" A groggy Elena answered her phone. She had fallen asleep on her couch as she was looking over paperwork.

"Elena? This is Tifa. Um, do you think you can come by the bar and pick up Reno?" There was an unsteadiness to her voice.

"Pick him up? What did he do?" Thoughts of him getting into drunken fights and using his EMR to his advantage were crossing her mind. But then again, maybe he was just passed out drunk.

"Well, nothing really. He came in looking pretty tired, sick actually. And, well, he just passed out."

Passed out _sick_?

"Alright. I'll call Rude to help. We'll be over there soon."

* * *

Both Turks arrived at Seventh Heaven well after closing time. Cloud was sitting at the bar when they walked in. "He's upstairs in Denzel's room." He said barely acknowledging them. Elena nodded to him as Rude went ahead.

In the room, Tifa was standing near the bed where Reno was splayed out, her hands on her hips with a thinking expression on her face. She probably got Cloud to carry him into the room, that must've been why he looked like he was just dumped there.

"He still breathing?" Rude asked. He had his shades on even in the dim lighting.

"Yeah, he's fine. I think he might be running a bit of a fever. But he's alive." Tifa said with a smile.

"We'll take it from here." He said as he uncovered Reno and began picking him up.

"Thanks Tifa. We'll have Reno make it up to you when he's better." Elena smiled back.

"Ready?" Rude asked as he slung his teammate over his shoulder effortlessly. Elena nodded and they headed downstairs.

* * *

In the car, Elena pulled out her phone. She had a missed call from Tseng, so she called him back.

"Well," She sighed flipping her phone shut, "One of us has to stay with Reno at least for tonight to make sure he gets through."

The pair went silent for a moment, the only sound was of Reno's light snoring. "I'll do it." Rude spoke up. "You go get some sleep."

"Thanks. I'll keep watch tomorrow." The car pulled into a apartment complex and parked. Elena got out and fished Reno's keys out from his jacket pocket while Rude dragged him from the car. Luckily, they only had one flight of stairs to climb.

"Do you think you can find a place to sleep in here?" Elena asked while carefully avoiding various objects strewn about the bedroom floor.

"I'll sleep on the couch." Rude replied, tossing the covers over Reno. Then again, the couch didn't look that great either judging from the quick glance he gave as they entered.

"Well I'll come by in the morning. Just make sure you don't get too close to him, you might catch whatever it is he has." She cringed. Rude was about to say how impossible it was to catch the 'idiot' bacteria, but he decided to refrain.

"See ya." She waved and walked out of the room. Once he heard the outside door close he took off his shades and headed into the living room. He carefully sat on the couch. Not _too_ bad, but he wasn't all that tired anymore.

With a heavy sigh he sat back and closed his eyes. He was in for a long night.


	6. Feeling better? Get back to work!

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters or settings or 7up.

* * *

Rude woke up to loud knocking on the door. He stood up and instantly felt pain in his back. He hadn't moved from his sitting position on the couch all night and now his muscles were mad at him.

"Hey Rude." Elena greeted brightly. Someone had a decent nights sleep in their own comfy bed. "How's Reno?" She had a large brown paper bag in her arms. How he hoped there was aspirin in there.

"Don't know. I just woke up." He said closing the door behind her.

"You did? It's almost noon." Her voice echoed as she walked into the kitchen. Shit. Was it really? He couldn't remember the last time he'd slept in this late.

"I got some aspirin, some food cause I know there isn't any here," She started pulling items out of the brown bag of tricks, "And some 7up."

"What for?" Rude yawned, walking over to the counter to grab some painkillers.

"Just trust me. It's an old remedy sort of thing my dad use use. Whenever one of us had the flu, or a bad cold, he'd give us 7up to drink. And it's also good for settling the stomach. Works for hangovers too." A loud moan emitted from the bedroom. Both Turks glanced at each other then headed for the room, Elena with the soda bottle in hand.

"She gave me fuckin' brandy didn't she?" Reno's voice was hoarse, "I told her once before that it makes me sick, but no." He rolled over to face his comrades. "She pulled one over on me." His complexion had gone back to it's natural hue, but he still looked weak.

"Here," Elena said approaching his bed, "Drink this. It'll help."

"No, no more liquor El." He pleaded. Unfazed, she placed the bottle on his nightstand and sat on the bed next to him.

"Feeling better I guess?" Rude asked.

"What the hell happened last night?" Reno said rubbing his eyes, "I mean, I never expected blondie boy to slip me a roofie." He cracked a sly grin. Even sick as a dog his humor was still intact.

"That didn't happen. Did it?" Elena asked curiously.

Reno laughed, "Hell, I hope not. Then again, I wouldn't be surprised. No one can resist my sexual magnetism."

"Oh please," Elena sighed while lightly punching him in the arm, "He's fine." She said to Rude as she stood up.

"You don't remember anything about last night?" Rude questioned.

Reno thought for a bit. "Ya know, for the first time, I can remember a little bit." He gave a small laugh, "I walked into the bar, took a sip of a drink that tasted nasty, stood up to leave, then…."

"You collapsed." Rude finished.

"Right into Cloud's arms I bet." Elena smirked. Reno shot her a look between horror and revulsion.

"Anything else?" Rude asked as Elena tried her best to suppress her laughter.

"Well, my head was hurting pretty bad. I don't know, probably caught some bug that's going around." He leaned on his side. "I'm alright. A little weak, but I can sleep it off."

"You're lucky it's been slow this week." Elena added.

"By the way, your couch sucks, I'm gonna catch up on my sleep at work." Rude said with a hint of annoyance.

"So you're good then?" Elena asked.

"Yeah, you two may leave now." Reno said in a royal tone as he waved them out towards the door.

"Gladly." Rude sighed and headed out.

"There's food in the kitchen." Elena said and shut the door, "See you tomorrow!" Reno turned onto his back and stretched. He had the whole day to sleep in and he was gonna take full advantage of it.

* * *

"How is he?" Tseng asked as he walked in the Turks office. He had a giant stack of folders stuffed with papers in his arms. Not a good sign. Rude prayed it wasn't for him. He was hoping to get off easy today and possibly catch some shut eye during periodic breaks. Elena didn't want the evil stack either. Sure she was rested and in a good mood, but she'd had enough paperwork the night before.

"He's good sir. A little weak still, but better than how we found him." Elena replied acting busy and not making eye contact, hoping that Tseng would get the idea she didn't want anymore work.

"Good. Just in time for a mission we have slotted for tomorrow." He stopped in front of Reno's empty desk. He seemed to hesitate for a split second then dumped the pile onto the desktop.

"Thank goodness things are picking up again." Elena finally looked up to see Tseng walk from Reno's desk towards the door with a barely noticeable grin on his face.

Rude gave a grunt of approval. "Gotta get out and do something." Tseng's face seemed to agree. Being cooped up in an office for hours on end wasn't what this job was made for. In a way, he was jealous of Reno who was probably drifting away in dreamland.

* * *

Reno felt like his old self as his eyes opened to the sunlight streaming into his room. Man he felt good. No, not good, but _great_. Elena was right after all, that 7 up stuff really worked. He made a mental note to stock up for some future hangovers.

After showering, getting dressed and eating the food that Elena bought him, he headed off to work.

"Miss me?" He said sauntering through the door to the office.

"I'll be damned." Rude said from his desk.

"Well?" Elena smiled from hers.

"Well El, I gotta hand it to ya," He said walking to her desk and taking a seat on top, "That 7up trick works." She smiled in satisfaction. "So, now that -," He stopped as soon as he saw his desk, "Ok wait, wait, wait, wait a minuet!! Just cause I'm sick means you guys get to dump all your paperwork on me?" He pointed to the stack comfortably atop his desk.

"Tseng did it." Rude said quickly. Elena quickly nodded her head in agreement.

"Well what the - "

"You don't have to start until we get back." Tseng said magically appearing. It always creeped Reno out when he did that, just show up without making any noise. "Unless you're just dying to get started." Another one of his ghostly smiles crept onto his face.

"Get back? You mean we're finally getting out of here and doing something?" Reno stood up excitedly.

"Yes. And we're due to leave in a few hours, so it'd be wise to stay put and save your renewed energy." He said walking out.

Finally! Just what he needed. What they _all_ needed really, to get out and kick some ass before they kicked each others. "So El," He cooed as he sat himself back down atop her desk, "How does fifty gil sound to do my paperwork for me?"

* * *

**A/N: **Yes, that whole 7up myth thing is something my dad use to use on us kids all the time. And I still use it for hangovers or that very night when you're still dead drunk and want something to help sober you up. Yup. 7up and crackers.


	7. Double Vision

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters of the settings.

* * *

Work was back to the normal pace. Halloween came but Reno wasn't as enthused as he once was. He just stole Elena's secret stash of candy from her desk drawer and blasted as many Halloween themed songs he could find. Later that night he and Rude hit Seventh Heaven for a few drinks and conversation with Tifa.

He happened to be running late this morning though. As he walked through the halls he couldn't help but notice everyone staring at him oddly. What? Have they never seen him get to work late before?

"Nice of you to come by again Reno." Elena said as he walked into the office. Her arms were crossed as she sported an annoyed look on her face.

"Again?" He asked going to his desk, "I just got here. Late too. You're not gonna rat on me to Tseng are you?"

"Maybe. It depends what direction this little prank of your's is heading." She eyed him suspiciously.

"What?" He sat down in his comfy seat. Dammit! Almost every time he arrives in the morning his seat's been lowered. "Hey El, next time you use my chair, be sure to raise it back up to normal people's height." He reached below and pulled a lever to make his seat rise so his legs wouldn't drag on the floor.

"Stop changing the subject Reno." She deadpanned. "How'd you change your hair so fast? Was it a wig?"

Reno looked up at her. "Look El, I don't what you're smoking, and really it's none of my business what you do with your extra money and time, but are you sure you're getting quality stuff from your dealer? Cause -"

"Whatever!" She threw her hands up in exasperation.

Rude walked in and stopped in his tracks. "How'd you get here so quick?" He asked.

"What are you guys talking about? I _just_ got here!" Reno practically yelled.

"Ok." Rude said calmly as he walked to his desk. "But I just saw you walking out from the lab. I thought maybe you were showing Elizabeth your new hair color."

"It's a wig. It has to be." Elena chimed in.

"Alright," Reno sighed, trying to calm himself, "Show me where I _supposedly_ was." He demanded standing up. Unless he had a doppelganger walking around or they were trying to pull a joke on him, he wanted to know what was going on. His two comrades nodded to each other and lead him out the door.

"Over there," Rude pointed, "And -" Reno looked up at his friend who was practically gawking. He followed his gaze. There, just a few feet from the entrance to the lab was a guy talking with the same secretary he was flirting with just a few days ago. But, something was wrong.

"Oh. So you _weren't_ joking." Elena said. The guy turned and starting walking in their direction. Reno saw the hair, the suit….

"Hey, that's…me?"

**WVW**

"My bad." Rude finally said. The familiar stranger kept his easy pace towards them seemingly caught up in the sights around him.

Without thinking Reno marched up to the clone and stopped in front him. He almost bumped into Reno due to his lack of attention. "Ok who are you? And what do you think you're doing prancing around dressed like me?" Reno demanded.

The look-a-like merely blinked in confusion. Reno noticed even his eyes were the same color as his own. "I beg your pardon?" He asked smoothly.

"You heard me!" Reno yelled. Everyone that was in the hall at that moment stopped what they were doing, now interested in the scene unfolding.

"Tell you what," Elena said nervously. She quickly moved between the two and escorted the clone away from Reno who she thought was about to beat the poor guy senseless. Rude moved in and restrained Reno from lunging at him. "Why don't we take this somewhere private."

The group shuffled their way through the crowd of peering eyes and finally made it back safely to their office. "Reno, sit down." Rude instructed as he closed the door behind them. Elena ushered the clone to the other side of the room, as far away as she could get him from Reno, and sat him down.

"Ok," She sighed as she sat on her desk top, "Now, what is your name?" She patiently asked the man.

"My name?" His bright aqua eyes looked up at her. Elena couldn't help staring at him. His hair was exactly like Reno's except black, jet black like Tseng's, same eyes, same face structure, body frame. But two things were off : his suit was neatly ironed, shirt tucked in and buttoned and he actually wore a tie. It looked very strange seeing him like that, but then again it wasn't Reno, the _real_ Reno anyways. The second thing was that the scars under his eyes weren't there.

"I…I don't know." He looked helpless, "I do not believe I have one."

"Alright then, where are you from?" She asked.

"Here?" He said confused, "I awoke in the lab, so I'm assuming I live or work here."

"In the lab?" Elena thought out loud. "Hojo." Rude said.

Reno jumped out of his seat, "Wait a minuet! You guys think he did this?" Then, it all started to piece itself together. The bright light at the lab, Hojo and that giant sci-fi machine…"_I was merely testing my machine"…"It's every scientists favorite holiday"…_

That guy made a clone out of him! "That little bastard cloned me!" He slammed a fist on his desk.

"But, why?" Elena asked.

"Because he's jealous of me and wishes he could be me and -"

"You've been flirting with his lab assistant." Rude cut in.

"Well damn. I didn't know he hung his label on her. He's getting back at me for that? Like this?" He pointed to his black haired carbon copy.

The clone looked offended, "Are you implying that I'm a sort of mad science experiment?"

"Yes! And you talk like some reject beatnik from England!" Both Elena and Rude could only watch as the two argued. It was a bit mind boggling to see Reno argue with himself even though it _wasn't_ really with himself.

"Ok! Ok," Elena eventually stepped in, "Hang on a second." She told the clone as she walked over to where Reno was fuming. "Listen, calm down. Now that you've figured this out the best thing we can do is let Tseng know about it and hope we can track down Hojo so he can…" she searched for a word, "_un-do _this whole thing, ok?"

Reno seemed to calm down a bit. His anger was subsiding only due to the fact that if he tried to attack the imposter, he'd get tackled by Rude and Elena would probably shock the hell out of him with his own EMR. Ah, teammates. Also, he was getting a bit curious. It crept him out just looking at a clone of himself, but it was also kinda flattering in a way.

Tseng walked in on the madness, "Alright -" He stopped in his tracks. Reno could've busted out laughing and rolling on the floor by the look on his face, and he would have on any normal occasion. "What's going on?" Tseng said sternly.

"Well, do you want him to tell ya," Reno said pointing to the clone, "Or should we start from the top?"

Tseng looked pleadingly at Elena. "Well," she sighed, "I guess I'll start from the top."

**WVW**

"So you believe Hojo was responsible for this?" Tseng asked while inspecting the clone.

"Who else knows how to do this kinda stuff? Not to mention has the time and equipment." Reno said.

Tseng slouched in his seat, "Well I'm afraid we can't handle this today." He said looking down at the floor. "For one, we have a mission to see to today. And two, Hojo isn't here."

"So how are we going on a mission with two Reno's?" Elena asked.

"We aren't. Reno will have to stay behind for this one. And tomorrow we will fix this. In the meantime," He swerved his chair to look at Reno, "You'll have to keep your other half occupied."

"Oh shit." Reno huffed as he banged his head down on his desk. First he can't go on a mission and now he's stuck babysitting himself. Wait a minuet, that sounded weird.

"Better think of something to do." Rude added his two cents. Damn right he better find something to do. He sure as hell wasn't staying here all day with this psycho clone. The only other - wait!

He quickly lifted his head from the desk and looked at his clone. He could have some fun this guy. A little trip to his favorite bar might prove to be a good source of entertainment after all.

**WVW**

**A/N: **Thank you guys for still reviewing! Hope you all have a good holiday season (bahumbugg!) Even though I won't be. I'll try to have this story wrapped up quickly cause I really want to work on other things and it's kinda hard when something else keeps pulling at you to finish…(coughRenocough) ;)

_Reno: Hey! _


	8. Fast Times at Seventh Heaven

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters or the bar…sniff sniff.

**WVW**

"Will you stop that?" Reno yelled as he smacked his clone upside the head and promptly switched on the child lock for the windows. The clone in turn just calmly smoothed out his hair and returned to looking out the window.

Damn Gaia to holy! If he would've known it was gonna be this annoying he would've just stayed at headquarters and 'accidentally' locked the guy in the basement. Walking to Seventh Heaven was out of the question. He could just picture it in his mind : All the weird looks and comments in the world thrown at him like he was a circus freak. That and he would have to keep his look-a-like in his sights at all times, not an easy thing to do. Especially when he has the attention span of a five year old.

"That too!" He swatted the clones' hand away from the radio. Thankfully he managed to commandeer a company car. If only he remembered to bring duck tape and rope.

"Are you taking me to be destroyed?" The clone asked solemnly.

"Destroyed? No, not yet. That comes tomorrow, right now we're going to go have some fun." Reno said mischievously.

"Fun?" The clone spoke the foreign word.

"Yup. My kinda fun." He smiled.

**WVW**

Reno gave a few loud knocks on the bar door. "I believe they are closed." The clone pointed out.

"No shit. What made you think that?" He countered sarcastically while peering through the nearest window.

"The sign says so." The clone said.

"I swear…" Reno clenched his teeth. Then, he spotted a figure moving towards the door, "It's Tifa. Quick, stand right here and don't move." He instructed the clone while he positioned it off to his left hand side and out of view. "And don't make any noise." He added.

The bar door opened along with a jingle of bells to reveal Tifa. "Reno we're closed, I can't -"

"I know, I know, but I need you to do me a favor." He asked.

"No, I'm not letting you watch the bar." She sighed.

"No, that's not what I meant. I just….have nowhere else to go and -"

"What did you do this time?" She crossed her arms.

"It's a long story." He looked down at the ground dejectedly. "How 'bout I tell you inside?" He flashed a grin.

"Ok fine." She sighed and opened the door all the way, "But you better not pull any of your tricks." She called over her shoulder as she headed towards the bar top.

"By the way, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine." He said holding the door open for the dark haired stranger.

"What the?"

**WVW**

"I told you not to pull any of your -!"

"Wait a minuet! Just give me a second alright?" Reno begged as his clone stood beside him looking around sheepishly.

"Make it quick!" Tifa ordered as she flexed her fists.

"Um, ok, " He hesitated as he glanced at his twin, "Hojohassomethingagainstmesohe !"

Tifa blinked in confusion. "You said to make it quick." Reno laughed nervously.

"So….he's your clone?" She asked pointing to his dark haired alter ego, who was currently studying a picture on the wall.

"Yeah. A sad excuse for a clone of me, but yeah." He grumbled.

"This picture is beautiful." The clone remarked as he absent mindedly traced his finger along the glass. "Did you take this picture?" He turned to Tifa.

"Me? No, Cloud did. He takes pictures when he goes on deliveries." The clone stared at her blankly.

"In other words her boyfriend took them. Come on let's go sit down." Reno said nonchalantly as he lead the way to the bar.

"Boyfriend?" Tifa said annoyingly as Reno sauntered past her.

"Me? No, technically me and you are just _friends_." He drawled as he stopped to look at her.

"Not you. Cloud and what you said about….Nevermind." She said throwing her hands up in defeat as she continued her way to the bar.

"Well you guys are aren't you?" He asked trailing behind her with his hands in his pockets.

"None of your business Reno." She said coldly and left it at that. Reno loved teasing her about blondie boy and their relationship. Hell, they were living together and even had two kids they were looking after. That doesn't sound like 'just friends' terms to him.

He took a seat at the counter. "How about two scotches on the rocks?" He smiled warmly.

Tifa tossed him a look. "They're not both for _me_." He said in defense. "The other is for my - hey, where is he anyways?" He asked looking behind him to see the clone still engrossed in the same picture.

"Hey you!" He yelled. The clone quickly snapped his head towards the bar. "Get over _here_!" He pointed to the seat next to him.

Tifa couldn't help but chuckle under her breath. The way Reno said it sounded like a mother talking to her rebellious child. She served the drinks as the clone made it's way to the bar.

"Here ya go," Reno said as he slid the glass across to his clone, "Drink up." He raised his glass in a salute before downing a large gulp.

The clone sat down in his seat gingerly and brought the glass up to his nose taking a sniff. "What is this?" He asked, his face contorted in fear, "It smells like poison."

"Not really, but it's good for ya. It'll help loosen ya up. Drink it." Reno reassured then demonstrated by taking another large gulp from his glass emptying it.

The clone did as he was shown and swallowed a large amount of the liquor before placing his glass back on the counter and contorting his face in disgust. "The taste isn't very pleasurable." He croaked still tasting the bitterness.

"How about I make you something a little better tasting?" Tifa asked.

"Would you?" The clone asked wearily looking at his glass.

"Sure. I know a drink you might like." She replied cheerfully and set to pulling out bottles.

"So…," Reno began, "You know Tifa, clone boy over here doesn't have a name." He said out loud. "How's about we give him one?"

"Give me? A name?" The clone said hopefully.

"Yeah, so let's see….I'm thinking it should start with a R, cause me and Rude's name start with one, so how about…Ronald?"

"Ronald?" Tifa said sliding her newest concoction in front of the nameless clone. "No, that sounds like some old man name." She elaborated while wiping her hands on a towel.

"Ricky?" Reno said while motioning Tifa for a refill.

"No, that sounds like a nerd name." She thought out loud while pouring another drink for Reno.

"Rumplestilskin?" He joked while taking a sip.

"No more refills." Tifa deadpanned. Reno made a gurgling noise in his glass. "I know! How about Roger? That's a nice name right?" She said looking to both for their reactions.

"What kind of -" Reno began as he wiped his mouth.

"I like that name." The clone interrupted. Tifa gave a dazzling smile. Reno was starting to think this clone of his was starting to get the hots for Tifa. Then again, if he was his clone he go for her too. But that's besides the point.

"Alright then, Roger it is." Reno announced.

"I have a name." Roger said proudly.

"Yessir, so how about we celebrate with a shot? Tifa, if you'd do the honors." Reno said.

"A shot?" Roger almost yelled. "Why are needles needed?" He began to panic.

"Needles? What the hell?" Reno could see that he was visibly shaking with fear. "Hey man, calm down. I meant a shot of whiskey, or vodka if you prefer." He trailed off.

"Here ya go." Tifa said setting out two shot glasses, "so what'll it be?"

Reno thought for a second, "Ah what the hell, let's have some vodka!"

"A drink?" Roger asked sheepishly, "Okay."

"That's the spirit!" Reno laughed while smacking him on the back.

"I guess I take one with you." Tifa said placing another shot glass on the counter.

" 'Atta girl! Join in!" Reno commended. They each grabbed a shot glass and raised them towards each other. "To Roger!" Reno announced.

"To Roger!" Tifa echoed. Roger himself gave a shy smile before they all downed the shot together.

**WVW**

An hour and a half later Reno was still ordering drinks, mostly for himself. Roger was silently staring at his empty glass that he had downed almost thirty minuets ago.

"Roger you sure you're ok?" Tifa asked concerned. He slowly looked up at her and smiled like a goofball. "I take that as a yes." She said as she propped her elbows on the counter and rested her head in her hands. "So you guys aren't heading back to work anytime soon?" She asked Reno.

"I don't plan on it." He said taking a gulp.

The man was a machine when it came to liquor consumption. Tifa had seen him put away almost a dozen shots and about a six pack of beer and not show any visible sign of being drunk. She had lost count on how many glasses she'd given him already. "Why do you think I came here?" He glanced at the clock, it wasn't even five o'clock yet and his clone was looking on the verge of passing out. But he wasn't through with him yet. "Let's take another shot Roger, what do ya say?"

Roger silently nodded his head, then looked up to meet Reno's gaze. He mumbled something inaudibly that sounded like 'no thanks'. Tough luck though. If you want to hang with Reno, you gotta be able to handle your liquor, or you'll be teased mercilessly. Rude was the exception though. He couldn't really take that much, but because he was bigger than Reno, and could overpower him, he didn't count. He learned that a while back when he woke up from a black out only to discover he was sober, not hung over.

Tifa once again lined up the shots, this time with whiskey, but left herself out.

"Cheers." Reno saluted to Roger, who downed the shot then lowered his glass to the counter just as his head did the same.

**WVW**

"Why is it my fault?" Reno asked Tifa as she rushed upstairs to fix a bed for the passed out clone. "I mean he is a clone of _me_. I thought he'd be able to hold his liquor."

She walked past him not saying a word. "You're carrying him upstairs!" She called from a closet where she was gathering bed sheets and covers.

Oh great. Now he had to carry this drunk ass up stairs. He looked down on the sleeping Roger. He had to carry his clone to bed. In reality, he had to carry _himself _up to bed. That just sounded creepy. Tifa emerged from the staircase with a pointed look on her face.

"Why can't he just sleep on the couch?" He asked pulling the drunkard from the barstool.

"Because that's where you're sleeping." Tifa answered. Ouch. That woman's spark never goes out. With a deep breath, Reno slung the seemingly lifeless body over his shoulders and started for the stairs.

After throwing the party pooper on the bed and watching Tifa fuss over him and his drunk state, Reno headed back downstairs to the couch and spread out. A nap ought to help pass some time by, or he could go out and get something to eat. Anyhow, he couldn't far without Roger. The poor guy might end up puking his guts out in a few hours and he'd be damned if he was around to watch that happen. After thinking through possible options, he opted to just close his eyes and fall asleep.

**WVW**

**A/N: **Ah, only Reno would take the opportunity to get his clone wasted. I was doing a little drinking while I wrote this too I'll admit! But it helped! Honest!


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the characters or the settings or 7up. Except Roger! Well, his name at least and his characteristics.

**WVW**

"Reno," Someone was shaking him, "Reno wake up." He slowly opened his sleepy eyes to see Tifa standing over him in the dim lighting. "Time to wake up, you've slept long enough."

He has? "What time is it?" He asked groggily as he sat up.

"Almost seven." She replied walking to the window and peeking out the blinds.

"At night?" His eyes widened.

"No," She laughed as she walked back to the couch, "In the morning. You were out like a light." She added with a smile.

Holy crap. The last time he slept that long was…well, he'd rather not remember. What he would like to know was how many times Roger had to worship at the porcelain throne. He must be feeling like road kill in the middle of the highway.

"How sick is he?" He asked running a hand through his hair.

"Sick? He's just fine. A bit sleepy like you, but fine." Ha! So he was right! That sorry little clone can hold his liquor!

"Well I'll be damned. He still sleeping?" He searched for his phone in his pocket.

"No, I thought I heard him walking to the bathroom a few minuets ago." She said. Damn, maybe he's one of those that don't hurl until late the next day. He checked his phone to find he had five missed calls, one from Tseng, one from Rude, and three from Elena. He'd check them and call later. First, he needed to eat something.

"How about some breakfast?" Tifa asked as she walked to the door.

"Well Tifa, you just read my mind." He smiled.

**WVW**

Roger came downstairs a few minuets later as Reno was sitting at the counter and

Tifa was cooking. He looked worn down and haggard.

"How ya feeling?" Reno asked sipping on some coffee. Roger grunted in reply as he sat down next to him.

"What is that smell?" Roger asked sniffing the air.

"Eggs." Tifa turned around with a frying pan in her hand. "You hungry?" Without a seconds hesitation, he bolted from his seat and upstairs.

Reno heard a loud hurling sound. "Nope, guess he can't hold his liquor." He gathered from how near it sounded that he didn't make it to the bathroom.

**WVW**

"I'm so glad I don't have to clean that up." Reno mumbled to himself as he helped Roger back into bed.

"Tell Tifa that I'm sorry about the accident." Accident? He made it sound like a puppy just pissed on the floor or something.

"Alright, don't worry about it." Reno covered him with a sheet. "Just lay low for a little bit, I'll be back." He walked out into the hallway where the mess was nowhere to be seen. That girl works fast.

"How is he?" Tifa emerged from the bathroom drying her hands with a paper towel.

"He's fine, just give him some 7up and he should be good to go." He flipped his phone open to reveal he had another missed call from Elena.

"7up?" Tifa questioned out loud.

"Yeah, just trust me on it. It worked for me." He winked and headed downstairs. He decided to call Rude instead of facing a barrage of questions from the other two.

"Yeah?" Rude answered.

"Hey you guys back yet?" Reno asked taking a seat at the bar.

"Got back late last night. How's the clone?"

"Well, uh, I think he's been better."

"What did you do to him?" Rude asked. It's always hard to tell any emotion in his voice.

"Why would you think _I _did something to him? With his luck anything bad can happen to him since he has the brain of a two year old." Reno defended.

"…."

"Okay so I gave him a _little_ to drink? What's wrong with that? It's not my fault he can't hold his liquor."

"Tseng wants you to be here as soon as you can." He changed the subject.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be there as soon as fairy boy gets his act together." He watched as Tifa emerged from upstairs and began filling a large glass with 7up. "And tell Elena to stop calling me!" He added in frustration.

"Will do. Later." He hung up. Well, since he's not going anywhere for awhile, he might as well help himself to seconds of Tifa's delicious pancakes.

**WVW**

"Here, this should make your stomach feel better." Tifa handed the glass to Roger. "At least Reno thinks so." She smiled.

He smiled back and took a careful sip. Tifa had to admit that the clone was slightly better looking than the real Reno. The dark hair gave him a mysterious look and his face looked flawless without the red scars underneath his eyes.

"I'm going to be destroyed today." Roger said wistfully.

"What makes you think that?" Tifa asked for the sake of conversation. Even she knew he eventually had to be taken back to Hojo's lab and dealt with. But what if there was a way to keep him alive? No, it would just be a problem. But who knew that Hojo would create something that wasn't a monster or a threat to somebody? Was it a mistake that this clone came out so docile and even innocent?

"Reno said so." He added staring into space.

She had no idea how to answer to that. So she opted to say what she told everyone back when they were in AVALANCHE. "It'll be alright." She reassured him and patted him on his shoulder. Roger in turn gave a small smile and returned to finishing his drink.

**WVW**

"Gimme a break," Reno sighed as he tossed his phone over his shoulder to the backseat. "Roger, make a mental note. Don't hang around with Elena, she's a crazy b-,"

"Is she the one that was talking with me the other day?" Roger interrupted as he flipped the visor down and opened the tiny mirror within.

"Yeah, stay away, she's on medication." He had finished listening to and deleting all the messages she had left him. '_Reno, call me back. And don't mess with that poor clone! He doesn't know any better!' 'Reno, are you and your clone having __that__ much fun over at your place? Call me back!' 'Reno…._'blah blah blah. That women can talk a mannequin to death.

Luckily the pair arrived at around lunch time, so there weren't many people in the halls. As they arrived at the Turk office only Rude was inside.

"Glad you could make it." He said with as much sarcasm he could muster in his monotone voice.

"Yeah, well just taking our time." Reno said out loud as he took a seat at his desk. Roger just stood beside him awkwardly. "Take a seat. Elena's not here, she won't mind." Reno motioned to her empty desk.

Roger sat down cautiously just as Elena herself burst through the door talking on her cell phone, "Reno, If you don't call me back I'll tell everybody that -," She stopped upon seeing Reno at his desk smiling from ear to ear.

"Aha! The crank caller caught in the act!" Reno announced triumphantly.

"Uh," She stammered before seeing the clone at her desk, "Hey, how are you?" She asked sweetly to avoid the confrontation beforehand.

The clone tensed up, "I know you're on medication, but please don't be mad at me for sitting at your desk." He pleaded.

Elena digested the words as her mind picked up the loud clicking of keys being punched on a keyboard. Reno was now visibly engrossed in his computer. "What did you tell him?" She demanded in such a violent tone that it made Reno flinch.

"Me? Why must you always assume that _I _am the one telling him these thing?" He answered confidently.

"Oh no you don't!" Elena yelled as she started towards his desk.

"Hey Rude? Where is Tseng?" Reno asked as he dodged Elena's fist.

"He should be on his way." He calmly replied as the chaos continued.

Then miraculously, Tseng walked in on the madness. "I just came from talking with Hojo." He announced. "I think it's time we head to the lab and take care of this."

Reno looked to Roger who looked visibly upset. The same emotion that was swirling inside himself, only camouflaged by his stoic expression.

**WVW**

**A/N:** I know it seems cut off, but it just felt right to end this chapter here .There ya go! See, I'm livin' up to my promise(so far) dammit….knock on wood. By the way, I know the title might suggest it, but no, this story was not inspired by the actual song 'Double Vision' by Foreigner. Although I do have the song on my PC. ;


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: **Don't own the Turks or Hojo or the settings. But Roger's mine.

**WVW**

"What's he gonna do to Roger?" Reno asked Tseng. Suddenly he could feel everyone's eyes on him.

"Who's Roger?" Tseng asked.

Reno pointed to the clone, "Him." He said proudly. Roger sat up in his seat and gave a small smile.

"How'd you find out his name?" Elena questioned.

"Well let's see, maybe he told me?" He said sarcastically. "Nah, _I_ named him. Or Tifa did really, but I was close!" Everyone was still looking at him like he was crazy. "What?"

"So, what _did_ you do while we were gone?" Tseng asked as he gracefully sat down in an empty chair next to Rude's desk.

"Just hung out at Tifa's, had a few drinks, ya know." Reno mumbled as he began tinkering with his computer again. Rude gave a suspicious cough.

"I got sick due to my excessive consumption of liquor." Roger blurted out.

"You got him drunk?" Tseng crossed his arms. The tone of his voice wasn't nice.

"He could've said no." Reno mumbled again.

"That's why you weren't answering your phone." Elena said devilishly.

"No, I wasn't answering my phone because _you_ were calling me!" He swiveled in his chair.

"How do you feel…Roger?" Tseng said awkwardly. He found the idea of naming the clone absolutely absurd, yet a very Reno thing to do.

"Fine sir." Roger answered respectfully. Tseng's eyebrow arched in surprise. If he wasn't a little 'out there' he'd probably make a pretty good Turk.

"That's surprising, considering how much Reno usually gets his victims to drink." Elena said spitefully. She had learned the hard way back when she had first joined the Turks. As a celebration, Reno offered to take her out for some drinks. Back then she was a bit scared and intimidated of him and Rude, so she politely took every drink he threw her way. In the end, she was so drunk she eventually blacked out. The hangover the next day was the worst feeling in the world.

"You've built up your tolerance since then, right?" Reno smiled evilly. Elena returned a glare.

"The shots were -," Roger began.

"No!" Reno cut him off, "Remember what I told you?" He added with a wink.

Roger thought for a second, "That Elena's a crazy b-,"

"NO!" Reno yelled suddenly. "I mean, no Roger," He calmed himself down, "I didn't mean say it out loud." He gave a little laugh. Rude thought for a second that it might be a good idea to hold Elena back. But then again…

"Alright, settle down." Tseng raised his hand to stop anymore nonsense. "Now, on with the matter on hand," He stood up, "Hojo is waiting for us at the lab, let's get going." They all stood up except for Roger who seemed glued to his seat with fear. Without a word, Reno helped him out of the chair and escorted him out into the hall for the long walk to the lab.

**WVW**

Nothing made sense. All Reno could think about was why would Hojo do this? It had to be more than just getting back at him for flirting with his lab assistant. Really, how desperate for revenge could that guy be over just that? Then again, it was Hojo, the same twisted dude who injected Sephiroth with Jenova cells while he was still -

"What are they going to do to me? Is it going to be painful?" Roger seemed on the verge of a panic attack.

"Take it easy," Reno assured, "We're just gonna have a talk." It was something that had been nagging him for awhile, but he finally accepted the fact that he was getting a little attached to Roger. Not in a weird kinda way, but he was his clone after all. Maybe that was the main source of it.

People in the halls parted for the Turks as they made their way down the hall. It was a known fact that whenever you saw _all _the Turks together that they were on their way to do some serious business. They were kind of like the mafia around headquarters with the suits and weapons and shades.

The bright lights of the laboratory brought an uneasy feeling back to Reno's stomach. And just like many times before, there was no one in sight. "Professor." Tseng commanded. After what seemed like a few minuets, the deranged scientist walked out from a back room. He slowly made his way to a medical table and began arranging different medical instruments and other things Reno couldn't identify. He was clearly taking his sweet damn time. And that said one thing about him : he listened to no one.

"Selfish prick." Reno let slip out of his mouth. Tseng gave a stern look out of the corner of his eye. But Reno knew he was thinking the same thing. That's the thing with Tseng though. Throughout the years, Reno came to learn that Tseng had a way with putting up pretenses, so it would seem that he could deal with Hojo or an annoying Rufus every now and then, but in reality he would rather pull out his gun and give them holy hell. Heh, an image of Tseng pulling a gun on Rufus actually looked pretty funny in Reno's mind.

"So," Hojo said in his nasally annoying voice as he turned around to face the group, "You all are doing well I believe?" He looked specifically at Reno and adjusted his glasses.

That little bastard! Reno reached for his EMR only to find it wasn't there. Damn, just when he needed it most. "I think you know why we are here Hojo." Tseng said.

"Ah yes, the clone. How is he?" Hojo asked peering through the crowd. Roger solemnly walked forward and stood beside the scientist.

"Might have some liver damage after last night." Reno mumbled audibly.

"What was that?" Hojo glanced at him curiously. Reno just shrugged it off as Elena gave him a light nudge with her elbow accompanied with a frown.

Hojo continued inspecting Roger. "So you want me to destroy him?" He said nonchalantly.

"Oh no." Roger moaned.

"Hey wait a minuet!" Reno demanded as he walked from the back of the group to the front next to Roger, "If he goes, then what's gonna happen to me?"

"To you? Nothing at all." Hojo said in a bored tone.

"Bullshit! You fuckin' cloned me. _Cloned_. Something's gonna happen." He noticed Rude gave a swift look to Tseng as he cussed. He probably thought Reno was about to jump Hojo's ass, which didn't seem like a bad idea.

"And what makes you think that?" Hojo replied unfazed. An invisible question mark hovered over everyone's head.

"Would you care to explain?" Tseng asked.

"Well you see, although the specimen does indeed look like him, he is in fact not a real clone of him. I simply used his characteristics on a completely different human sample body. Of course, I made a few changes to those characteristics as you can see by omitting and altering a few things. To the untrained eye, yes, they look like twins, but genetically they have nothing in common whatsoever." He said confidently.

"So he just looks like me, but really has no genetic connection to me?" Reno asked.

Hojo nodded. "Now, if you'd like to get this over with. I have other projects that need to be attended to." He said as he scurried off into the backroom again.

"Wait a minuet." Reno caught up with him, out of range where the others couldn't hear him, "Tell me exactly what you're gonna do. Is there a potion or something that you're gonna give him?"

"It's very simple. Just an injection. It will make him feel very lethargic and eventually he'll fall asleep." He said rummaging through a large white cabinet.

"So you're just gonna put him to sleep?" Reno glanced to make sure no one was listening.

"In a sense. He just won't wake up ever again. You see it slows the heart down so much that it eventually stops. It's not painful at all." He withdrew a syringe and a small bottle. "Now if you don't mind." He motioned for Reno to leave him alone to set up.

He walked back to where Elena was busy comforting a nervous looking Roger. "What did he say?" Rude asked.

Reno motioned for him and Tseng to step closer so Roger and Elena wouldn't overhear, "He's gonna put him to sleep. Like he's a dog or something." Both Turks remained quiet for a few seconds.

"There's no other choice Reno." Tseng began. "As harsh as it sounds, there's no place for him here. Even if he lived, there's no way he can make it on his own." Reno ran a hand through his hair. "You can't take care of him. It would be a full time job." As much as the truth hurt, it was still the truth. He had no idea it'd be affecting him this bad though.

"Are we all set?" Hojo asked from behind the group.

"Just make it quick." Reno said. "Roger," He said walking over to him, "He's just gonna give you a shot ok? It'll be real quick."

"A drink?" He said cautiously.

"No, not a drink. A shot, you know with a needle?" Reno patted him on the back, "It'll be real quick, you won't feel a thing." He winced at his choice of words. Reno lead Roger over to where Hojo was standing by a simple hospital type bed.

"Just lie down and stay still." Hojo instructed. The clone did as he was told. Reno took a few steps back as Hojo inserted the needle into Roger's right arm and withdrew it throwing it into a biohazard container. "Now, you may start to feel a bit sleepy, that's normal. Just continue lying very still."

"What if I fall asleep?" Roger asked.

"If you fall asleep then I'll wake you up, don't worry." Hojo lied.

"Ok." Roger smiled. Hojo walked off into the back room again. "You were right, it wasn't so bad." He said to Reno who was staring at the ground with his hands in his pockets. A minuet later Reno could see he was fighting to keep his eyes open.

"Don't fight it Roger, just go to sleep." He said in a low voice.

"Alright." He slurred.

"Goodbye Roger." Reno saw his eyes beginning to close.

"Bye…?" He trailed off and fell asleep. In all his years of Turk training and missions he had never felt back about death or killing. Just pull out a gun and fire. Quick and easy. He never thought watching someone just 'fall asleep' slowly would affect him. He wasn't his clone. Nothing shared genetically. Just a look a like.

Reno walked back to where the other three were still standing. "Well, show's over. Guess we can leave now." He said to them as he lead the way out the door.

**WVW**

Since when did he get so emotional and sappy over some freak accident clone? He had nothing in common with the guy genetically. But, for a while he really did think so.

He'd never admit it to the others, but he learned a lesson. Innocence isn't such a bad thing. Maybe he should try being a little less like an asshole for once.

Work had slowed down again, and all three were stuck in the office doing paperwork. Except Reno of course, who was busy randomly punching keys on his keyboard just for the sake of noise. Click-click-click-clickclickclickclickclick-click-click-BANG!

He barely dodged a stapler thrown by Elena that was aimed for his head. "Your aim sucks El. How did you _ever_ get into this line of work?" Reno mused.

"I might not be good at throwing things," Elena snarled, "But I'm pretty damn good at shooting things!" She opened her desk drawer and started rummaging for her gun.

Reno jumped out of his chair and threw a giant paper ball that he had been working on for months, hitting her smack dead on the forehead before running off towards the door, Elena hot on his heels. Maybe he should try being less like an asshole for once.

But why ruin the fun?

**Fin**

**A/N: **Whoa man, this one took a while to write. I'm still surprised I actually finished this thing! Honestly, I can't remember how long it's been since I've taken on a fairly sizable project and ended up finishing it. Yeah, why do ya think my 'real writing projects' aren't done yet? ;) Thanks everyone for reviewing and continuing to breathe new life into this story. I never thought it'd even get at least two reviews. It's been a wild couple of months, who woulda thought It start for Halloween and then go through Thanksgiving , Christmas _and_ New Years? There will be more multi fics to come! Now ya'll go and have a blasted good time this New Years Eve! Now if you excuse me, I have some partying to do. ;))


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